The Object Of My Attention

I think the unhealthy aspect of addiction and codependency is how it demands that people dealing with it not act in their own best interest and that they ignore their own desires. It is whether or not we are maintaining our own health and paying attention to the fulfillment of our desires that is the pertinent question as opposed to whether one stays or leaves. The answer to that becomes academic if we are taking care of ourselves. Because if one is healthy and fulfilled, they are stronger and more tolerant and more apt to make decisions that will be best for both themselves and those they love.

The other point I want to make is I truly believe that this talk of sickness is not the answer. Instead, talk of health and fulfillment... talk of the solution would be a better focus. We do need to be aware of the problem but we must remember to give the majority of our attention to the remedy, to what we want and to what is best. Otherwise we will continue to define the problem more and the solution less.