I have a friend, and it is really a friend, not me saying I am the friend. Anyway, he is using, shooting 6 bags of H a day, and then using coke at night. Well, long story short, he is wanting to be clean. So, he bought suboxon, and is using it himself, no doctor involved. Stupid, yes. I know this. He is in a half way house, and due to that, he can not go to a doctor, or he goes back to prison. That really isn't what is important right now, what is important is that he took his first pill, and went into full blown withdrawal. I called a dear friend of mine who has some knowledge of this stuff, to see what to do next. He did not know. So, I call my friend back, and tell him just wait it out, don't do anything, he says to me "Too late, already took another one." This was freaking hours ago, and now I can not reach him at all. His cell is off, and I am just so scared for him. I don't know what the hell to think, to do, anything. For all I know he is dead. I just don't know. I told him that if he is feeling anything that feels wrong, tell someone and get to the ER. From what little I know about this stuff, I think he is really playing with some serious fire here. Doing this without a doc is dangerous, from what I am reading, it is more dangerous than using. I am so scared for him, and so confused. He was calling me so much early this morning, telling me how he is feeling, waiting to be in hard withdrawal to take the stuff. Now, nothing. All day, since like 3:00, nothing. I am feeling panicky, nervous, scared to death for him. I don't know what I can do, really, there is nothing I can do. Just sit and wait, to see if I hear from him. I just wanted to get some of this out, I can't hold all this inside of me. I am ready to burst from all the shit I have going on in my life, and now this. I am praying he is ok. Anyone know what this shit is about?? Thanks for listening.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
I'm really sick. Its all on me and now I'm living with it. I'm not the only one in the world that is sick and doing this awful treatment and certainly not the only addict that has had a hard time doing interferon. It seemed easier the first time I did it but it didn't work. oh well I'm not the only one.
I actually feel good enough today to read a few blogs. I'm glad this one is still here. Thank you Erin for taking care of it. I'm glad you have chosen not to censer as long as its a drug related rant. I'm only supposing that was the case because I didn't read it. I've gotten a few very weird, not related to my blog responses and I have chosen to delete them. Now I mean weird and it takes alot to weird me out.
And I have been censored from blogs. My stuff gets a bit two four lettery sometimes but I usually try to stay in the spirit of things and sometimes a good number of four letter words is the way I choose to express that. But I bet that wasn't what was up at the cut blog here.
I agree with EJ. Ive never been kicked out of an NA meeting because of what I had to say. And only got asked politely at an AA meeting to refrain from so much drug talk. After reading the traditions I was much more careful about how I worded my drug talk as it has a profound impact on whether I drink eventually or not. But that's another story. I'm just glad I found NA when I did.
And I am way grateful to all the people who choose to share their recovery online in the manner that they do. I''m way to sick to go to a meeting tonight. And I believe there is some real depth to online sharing. I have gotten close with a number of people here. And also find I am staying in touch with people I have known in recovery for over 20 years but we don't live in the same part of the country any more.
Sorry if I am a bit rambley tonight. I really didn't feel like typing but I feel this is such an important blog that I'm doing it anyway. Thanks for the little piece of online program.
Written by msb at 7:12 PM
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
A few people have chimed in about the removal of a post because of it's content. I appreciate anyone who weighed in on the subject.
At the advice of EJ I re-read the posting rules that are on the site and I agree that in the future there should be no censoring of content. Instead, there will be a strong warning placed at the beginning of the post.
I think that this will satiate everyone and I hope that there are no hard feelings. I also appreciate everyone's patience while I try to get acclimated to the moderator role.
Written by erinsav at 9:48 AM
Monday, November 12, 2007
Although The Write Thought is an open forum, we need to be respectful of all members. I was recently contacted by a few members regarding something that was posted earlier today.
I read the post in question and while it was beautifully written, very descriptive and well put...it didn't really have the qualities that would make it a beneficial post on The Write Thought.
Although I am not a big fan of censoring, I do think that if an entry is posted with no other reason than to explain how to go about getting high...it doesn't fit in with what The Write Thought is about.
Please feel free to voice your opinion on this subject. I am open to suggestions on how to handle this type of thing in the future. For now, I got a few complaints and I felt that the best thing to do was to remove the post.
Written by erinsav at 10:17 AM