Saturday, August 11, 2007

Focus Pocus

Recent posts have really demonstrated how incredibly powerful a group blog can be. Though all of us write about an array of issues around life shared with addiction, this weeks theme seems to have been devoted to the stepping off point, the touted bottom that brings each of us to our senses whether we are the addict or the one in love with an addict (or both). Everyone has a different place where their focus becomes centered on their life and their need to have a better one. That act of taking care of ourselves is the foundation of our being able to give support to an addict, a friend or a loved one because it enables us to do what is best for them as well. Sometimes it means appearing selfish and it always means not supporting the addiction. Sometimes we can do it while together and other times we have to separate. Always, if we put our own well being first, we are giving the best advice by example. We show others our ability to love and just how strong we are by loving ourselves and having a joyous life. I know this is hard. I struggle to remain positive so I do not succumb to my addiction but more importantly, so I do not succumb to life.

It is no easy feat to get clean or sober. And I am finding it's even more difficult to build a life once you do. I liken it to crawling out of a deep hole and finding oneself at the foot of a very, tall mountain. I have to develop disciplines. I have to seek new adventures on my own. I have to explore my own spirituality. I have to contend with the joy of learning to manage overwhelming feelings in the best way possible while at the same time not be totally daunted by the awareness now that there are more feelings to wrestle with... a lot more. Where will I find a new answer seems to be my agenda. And on that quest I am finding one new thing leads me to another and then to another. There is no end. What is this? Life? I think it is my friends.

It's great to hear the stories of people who are at different places in their journey to a better life. It is inspiring and magical. So thank you all.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

It is magical at that, WS.
Thanks for another great post.
Peace,
Scout

joy said...

You have so much good sense. I don't believe you ever were an addict! You're an imposter! I've found you out!

I'm joking, of course...but really, often reading your comments or reading your posts is such a breath of fresh air. Thank you for being you, and writing, and sharing your journey with us.