I quote:

"We faced three disturbing realizations:

1. We are powerless over addiction and our lives are unmanageable;

2. Although we are not responsible for our disease, we are responsible for our recovery;

3. We can no longer blame people, places, and things for our addictions. We must face our problems and our feelings."

pg. 13 Basic Text of Narcotics Anonymous, Third Edition.

For me, responsibility is the operative point. And as long I try and shift the blame and not become accountable for my actions the longer I stay at the mercy of the powers that be. Inevitably, jails, institutions and death. And addiction is only mentioned in the first step of the twelve steps. The rest is all about profound change I must make in myself on every level.

The best "help" that has been given to me has been that of the tough love variety. Where I fess up and pay the consequences of my actions. Instead of suing the drug companies for prescribing a drug I used my best conniving to get or blaming the judicial system for locking me up when I got caught, I have found it more beneficial to look at myself instead. Make the necessary changes and I am released from the self inflicted shackles that have bound me for years.

A tall order I must admit.