Annus Mirabilis

I'm a stubborn boy. I do not yield easily. Every time I had a negative consequence because of my addiction I quickly pushed it aside in favor of a new strategy that would enable me to keep using. I was "not able to bring into mind with sufficient force the humiliation and suffering" of my present moment. I had prayed for a long time that somehow I'd be able to manage it; somehow be able to be an addict and still have a life. When I realized that such a thing was not possible, I prayed in earnest for God to let my life end. I have found that most people in recovery had a similar, profound pain.

People say to be careful what we pray for. I don't know what they are talking about. I prayed that God would end my life and He did. Just not the way I hoped for. You see, I had hoped that I would simply not wake up one morning, or perhaps I'd get hit by a bus. I hoped that it wouldn't be to painful. I would have done the job myself but I didn't have the courage.

Prayers are heard and prayers are answered. I prayed for my life to end and it ended. Today I have a different life. By using some simple tools taught to me in the loving fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous, and by the grace of an all merciful and loving Creator, I have gone to bed at night and gotten up in the morning, sober, for one year today.

The age of miracles is, indeed, upon us.

Thank you...

Yes it’s time to say thank you to each one of you for helping me in aiding another. I wish I could describe to you the gratitude this family has for each of you that helped by either reposting, by commenting, and of course those of you who were in a position to donate your hard earned money.

I knew this would raise controversy, I know there were risks involved in putting myself out there on the line by taking personal responsibility by tackling the idea of asking others to help one of our own. But I was deeply surprised by the overwhelming positive response that I received from so many people. I also have deep respect for those who spoke their minds regarding how they felt about what I was doing.

I can tell you with tremendous gratitude and respect that every penny was well spent keeping our friend’s family warm, helped them to keep their electricity on, and for them to be able to take hot showers and warm baths. This act of kindness from each of you has restored my faith in human nature, in a time where most people look out for themselves, in a society that shuns and looks the other way as American families are left out in the cold on the streets, hungry and without shelter.

This was a deeply spiritual and amazing experience for me. Yes, you and I, helped another, that in itself felt amazing to do. But there was more to it for me. I was able to give something back to the world I have spent a lifetime ripping off. It’s not about Karma, or trying to do the right thing, it was about doing what I felt needed to be done. In this case, not only was that accomplished for myself, but also one of us, one of our families was helped in a time of need, and I think it may have restored their faith in human kindness as well.

But don’t stop now. No, I am not asking you for more money, but just pay it forward. Practice random acts of kindness simply because it feels good to do so. Next time you see that homeless man with his sign sitting on the edge of the off ramp, give him a dollar. Or gather your old blankets and jackets that no longer fit your growing children and drop them off at your local homeless shelter. Ring bells for the Salvation Army this Christmas season. Let’s get the ball rolling folks. We as a community, one who has been shunned by most of society, labeled as substance abusers, junkies, drug addicts, can show that we too have the capacity to do good things, to have compassion towards others, and most of all, we are capable of selfless acts.

I can’t thank you enough!

With love to all,

Ej.

Thank you...

I wanted to take a moment and thank all of you who participate in this blog, both the writers and the readers. Thus far the blog has produced a variety of amazing topics from light hearted humor, to deep emotional issues, to personal triumphs and hardships, and everything in between. I have had the opportunity to see new people join and develop a sense of fellowship quickly and easily as everyone is welcome in our group. I have had the opportunity to meet new people and make new friends. I have grown to be a part of an amazing fellowship of diverse and wonderful people, and I couldn’t be more proud.

I know that each of the writers has his/her own individual blog, and it’s not always easy to find time, nor additional material to write about here. Yet, in a way, the blog and community has served its purpose in this area as to offer many topics based on solely on a single comment, or as offspring of another post. This is what makes every contribution an important one.

Every part of this blog contributes to the bigger picture; from each post to every comment, and the fellowship that has developed. Each is equal in importance as to its contribution to the blog as a whole. It proves to me that the whole has developed into something much larger than the sum of its parts.

So again I thank the writers for their contributions, the readers for their wonderful comments and input, and everyone as a group for making this blog it’s own unique, living, breathing, entity. It has grown of its own volition, and developed through individuality, different perspectives, and a common goal of sharing experience, strength, and hope.

One last note:

I have noticed that we seem to have more writers than I have links to each individual’s blog. If you are missing from our blog roll, please send me an email with a link so that it can be added to the site. Also if anyone has suggestions, comments, additional content, or anything at all that you think would make our blog better, please feel free to email me and let me know. This came together through a combined effort, and I would like to see it continue to grow through that very same combined effort, only now on a larger scale.